There’s always stress. As the leader of an organization, you’re going to be dealing with it. That’s a given.
The more useful question isn’t how to eliminate stress, but how to identify what kind of stress you’re in.
There’s good stress. And there’s bad stress.
You might think about it like good cholesterol and bad cholesterol. Or consider charcoal: put enough pressure on it, and it turns into a diamond. That’s good stress.
How to recognize good stress
Good stress brings you more focus, more intentionality.
It helps you define the problem.
It inspires you because it’s challenging.
When you’re doing something you love, you thrive. You may still be stressed by scheduling or by getting something done on time, but you’re enjoying what you’re doing.
Those are the signs of good stress.
How to recognize bad stress
Bad stress shows up as worry, anger, and uncertainty.
A lot of times we get into bad stress because we start believing the stories we’re telling ourselves. We repeat that story over and over until, in our mind, it’s become truth.
The other thing that happens with bad stress is worry over things that are completely out of our control.
And sometimes it comes from doing work you hate. This is the kind of stress that can lead to burnout.
Two questions to shift your thinking
When you’re in a stressful situation, here are two questions worth asking yourself.
Is what I’m telling myself true? Is it really true?
Where are the facts? Where’s the data? A lot of times you can’t find it. The truth may still be stressful, but at least now you can deal with it.
Is this in my control or not?
If it is, then you can do something about it. But if it’s not in your control, worry does nothing. Worry does not advance action. Worry just causes more bad stress.
Three strategies for dealing with stress
1. Make a plan
Give yourself permission to sit down and prioritize.
You can’t solve and fix all the things for all the people.
Think about your big goals, your vision, your mission, and use that to drive your priorities.
If your stress is coming from role responsibilities you don’t enjoy, it’s okay to say, “This isn’t a strong suit of mine” and then make a plan to find someone who gets energized by the work that makes you think ugh every time it crosses your desk.
Sometimes just having a plan can be a really great way to feel better.
2. Have the hard conversation
Be honest about whether you’re planning or avoiding. A lot of leaders will stew on a decision for months.
Usually, the delay comes down to not having the courage to have a difficult conversation with a family member or an employee.
You keep putting it off, even though you know it needs to be done to have the breakthrough.
Then you do it and you feel so much better. It relieves the stress, and it takes away the uncertainty.
3. Talk to somebody
There’s an old cliché that says you can’t read the label from inside the bottle. This is why we sometimes need some outside perspective.
In many cases, all it takes is some clarity and reframing to shift from bad stress to good stress.
The challenge here is that if you’re the leader, a lot of times you don’t have anybody to talk to.
Stress comes with leadership, but it doesn’t have to run the show.
A good place to start is to recognize the different between good stress and bad.
Taking the time to reflect and get outside perspective is often enough to shift bad stress into good stress by drawing your focus to what the real problem is, what part is under your control, and what needs to be done to address it.
And if there’s no one inside your organization to turn to, that outside perspective is exactly what our advisors at Ferguson Alliance are here to provide. Feel free to book a call to talk through the issues that are causing you stress.